In the last few weeks we began a new journey, albeit a bit rockily. New state, new temporary home, new jobs. And if you know me at all you know that change isn’t something I am very good at. I don’t really like it. I like the comfortable, the known.
But this was a needed move, and a good one at that.
In this new journey I purposed very early on to look for the silver linings. To look for anything and everything good, and that could bring me some sense of comfort, peace and normality. And in looking for these things I might keep some anxiety, worry and even any depression or sadness at bay. And I am happy to report that for the most part I have been successful in doing just that.
Some of these findings I have had to strive for, and some I seem to have been blessed with out of nowhere. Below are a few of these..
I lost things recently, like they were destroyed lost, not the they got up and wandered away kind of lost. But the good thing… I have been able to replace what was absolutely needed, but am not stressing about replacing the other things right away. I have some contentment (oddly) in waiting to later search out just the right pieces, of the important things. But I am also finding some things were just that… things, and are not necessarily important or even needed.
I have a longer drive to work than I have had in many years. But the good thing… there is much that is lovely to see along the way, even in scenery alone. I am also given lots of extra time to worship and to pray here in this drive. I am more able to really focus my prayers in and give extra time for any given friend or family member that comes to mind. Plus I get to see more wildlife… the deer are plenty up here and it is really nice to come around a bend and see a good sized herd eating contentedly in a field.
I have a new job in a field I was not looking in or would have expected for me. But the good thing… I am finding that I am enjoying this job. I am not only enjoying the job, but I and my contributions are appreciated and encouraged there. The supplies and equipment needed are always there, making my job all the more efficient. The staff is celebrated there. We had a luncheon on Friday – a Happy Birthday (another staff), Happy Retirement, we are going to miss you terribly (a different other staff), a we’re so happy to have you (yay, me!) here, and a Happy Friday luncheon, complete with a food choice addition made because of my own dietary restrictions. How cool is that!?! And yes, I get that this is not an every day thing, but man… what an awesome thing to get to have this amazing work environment! I feel truly blessed..
It snowed recently. It was a heavy, wet and freezing kind of snow. The snow day, even though the weather man said there would only be 1 to 2 inches (he fibbed) and it turned out to be 4-5 inches and keep your butt at home kind of snow. And the good thing… it allowed for one day to get more done at the house that needed to get done. And bonus, it was just beautiful outside, like a postcard or Christmas card beautiful. And second bonus, my Old English sheepdog found out that he loves the snow. He wanted out often and looked like a tigger bouncing through the snow, which was pretty darn adorable.
These are only a few of the many amazing silver linings I have experience in just the last two weeks.
I am quite sure something that my parents, and particularly my dad, used to somewhat regularly impress on us girls growing up was the importance of enjoying and being happy just right where you’re at. That looking forward and planning for future things was great, but that being in the moment, in the present, and finding the amazingness in that is just as important, if not more so.
Being happy where we are at isn’t an easy thing, probably for most anybody. It is especially not easy for someone who had gone through significant loss. Happy for us is more often associated with before the loss.
But in the last two weeks, probably more than at any other point in the last 8 years, I am getting that.. what my dad said/encouraged… And I can’t say that it will last, but I certainly hope that it does. That I don’t again get so caught up in the every day stresses that I can’t see the little things right in front of me.
I would like to go for that walk (though not in this cold), finding many hidden beauties in nature. I want to dance or jump and spin in the rain (in warmer weather, perhaps). To go for a drive with no set destination and enjoy the scenery along the way. To read a great book, and find some hidden marvelous insight in doing so. I want to see a bald eagle flying near, and feel that God is saying “Hey, this is going to be a great day!” (It’s a thing with God and me…)
And in everyday-ness… I want to find and make note of those things there. To be grateful and pleased to have noticed. To be contented with, and even happy with, being right where I’m at.
Of Loss and Love 